Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Day 5, Morning 6

"It seems like yesterday I was thinking something so good couldn't come my way. I was comfortable just sitting being all alone but, now I know that I cant ignore what my heart is telling me. I know I'm a little passed due, after all that I been through, break ups and make-ups and mistakes and heartaches, that aint you. I cant turn back now got me in over my head I'm in too deep!"


Hey my beautiful blogging people!! Today is currently Day 6 of my blog experience. So much has been happening lately. Yesterday I was way too upset to write. But I had to fix that this morning because my followers deserve better. So here I am! I went to the beach yesterday. After the long trip to get there I could not believe that all I wanted to do was lay on my beach towel and listen to my music! LOL. I know thats different but i have been feeling so somber lately. So I just lay there texting Brandyn and listening to my plethora of R&B songs. This didnt last long being that we were actually ready to come home! Omg when I got home my mother turned into a raging bull. I couldnt deal with it. I jus ignored her and tuned her out with my two trusted friends Mr. I-touch and Ms. Berry!! Through all of me ignoring her all i could think of was my father. He would usually be the one i ran to when i was going through all of my hard days. Now it was just me here all by myself living in this world of CRAZY! Good thing I have Brandyn and my twin who keeps me stable and focused on the bigger picture which is bettering me! In the end when I move out all I have is me, so the inarticulate and incoherent arguments were pointless. So I rather sit and take the abashment to establish and understand this is what I never want to be. I rather just sit and be a lady :-p. I've heard the curliest thing I've ever heard in my life which was directed towards me! I put on a tough outer layer. So when I'm being insulted or intimidated I just brush it off. But this was like none other. Yea of course I opted to act like a lady and not respond but this comment did something, not only to my feelings but to my integrity and my heart. I was told by my younger sister that she wished I would have died instead of my father!!! Are you serious??? And this was all because she had t wash dishes! I didnt let her see that she affected me but I went in the bathroom and cried the hardest i ever did since my dad passed. I didnt know what to do other than call the person who makes me happy no matter what...Brandyn. He made my night like he always does! I feel asleep more than happy that I have the best boyfriend ever!!


So thats the conclusive of this blog. 


I completed some things on my to do list of my summer adventures.


I am starting my flower memorability. 



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